"Laugh, or the monkey gets it. "

.-= PROUD WINNER OF THE 1998 USELESS PAGES SITE OF THE YEAR AWARD =-.
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 Nifty News & Decent Deals <- (Updated 3-5 Times/Day!)

New Update:

• Oh, you want more?  Then a fresh Handy Surefire Business Tactic you shall have!  Will Skippy return anytime soon?  Perhaps, perhaps...

    Old Updates:    

• Happy 2004, everyone! Just when you thought we had packed it in for good, I went and added another Handy Surefire Business Tactic. Sassy. I haven't spoken with Skippy in awhile, but the word on the street is that Skippy might be primed for a comeback. We'll see.

• Still alive, still no redesign.  We're shooting for 2006 on that.  Until then, I added another Handy Surefire Business Tactic.

• Thanks for all the emails, and no, we're not dead!  Maybe 2003 will bring that elusive total redesign.  But instead of holding our breath, let's read some fresh fortune cookies, shall we?

• Oh, what's that?  That.  Over in the corner.  Why, I think it's a new article.  Maybe you should read it.

• More amusing fortune cookies have been added.  Some lame ones have also been tacked on, but it's up to your to decide what's what.

• Guess who stopped by this weekend?  Why, the famed person behind Ask Skippy, that's who!  And now there are 20 new questions and answers posted for your amusement!  Thanks to a certain girl for the assistance.

• I got another set of ducks in the mail.  Up on the duck page they go.  Thanks guys!  Oh, and I should have some new content posted in the next day or two.

 Hey there!  Be sure to sign the Guestbook with your comments!   Thanks...

The following sections could use a graphic, and I'll get around to it some day...
Until then, the following are Homeless Links.  Trust me, they're funny, they just don't have a fancy graphic.
-The Niftyness Report #6-     -haiku's-     -Fortune Cookies-     -Take a peek at this check I got-
-Ask Skippy Link Phrases-    -Find The Black Dot-    -Tribute to the North Mariana Islands-
-Epileptic Seizure Fun-    -Adventure #4 panels-     -What is that thing?-    -Send me a Duck!-
-Three Dimensional Tic Tac Toe-    -Refer-a-friend-   -Candle of Perfection-    -Elvis is Dead-
-T.R.O.N. candy-    -Handy Surefire Business Tactics-    -Downloadable Soundland-
-Nothing Better To Do-    -Which Tank Girl Cast Member Am I?-    -Another Reason to Thank...-

I hope you enjoy....

Click above for the L.G.E.

Stressed out?  Feeling sad?  Try the Mood Enhancing Machine!

Please Feel Overly Privileged to Peruse Some of my Ranting as a (Warning: Ego Trip Ahead)    

Have a comment?  A suggestion?  Think I need a "stern talking to" or perhaps a good Jell-O recipe?  Send mail to:

Yeah yeah yeah, so maybe I don't have a big obnoxious floating mailbox icon or a big dog head that barks "send email," but this will just have to do.....:)  

Have you been in the Black Hole of Niftyness yet?  See if you can find it!

• Hey, want to see a goofy picture of my brother?  How about a normal one instead?  Perhaps a kinda blurry shot of my cat is what you're looking for instead?
• Speaking of Dan, have you checked out the Story of Dan's New Jeep yet?
• Want to see a normal picture of me?  Are you SURE?! Click here.
• Did you find a bad link?  You had better head to the bad link page!
• Want to see my tribute to my girlfriend?  Go see Marissa's page.
• Instead of links all over the place, I'm opting for a page of links.  I call it....the Link Page.  Check it out!
• If you, or someone you know, works for Yahoo, Infoseek, or any other major (humor) index, click here. 
• Do you like Guests?  Do you like Books?  Well, have I got a great link for YOU!  It's my GuestBook!  Sign it

-- This page was most recently crammed full of even more amusing material on 5/28/04 --  

Stay tuned for: a screensaver, a film clip, and a new adventure soon!  Bookmark today! 

Things recently duct-taped to the page:  HSBT6

This page best viewed with your head tilted wayyyyy to the right. More...more...MORE...perfect.

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